Reviewing Christian Codependence by Stephanie Tucker Textbook with Workbook
Stephanie Tucker’s Christian Codependence recovery is a collection of her thoughts primarily aimed at skeptics like her former self who wondered how the Bible could help her if the contained events and philosophies were to hold true. Tucker hopes to outline a Christ-centered skill set to interface with the world to be a community beneficial point of view.
The workbook is filled with lists of feelings and principles to begin building better relationships with one’s surroundings and environment. Brian Burgess and I took some time to review the text for this article.
The foreword OF Christian Codependence By Dr. Robert Tucker accurately addresses the goal of the text to expose lies, disclose truths, and receive “His true healing” (6). The formality of the book opens with taking a view at the experiences which have developed our identity as individuals and as a group of codependence. Tucker defines codependence as “a set of learned coping skills used to function in an environment that is imbalanced and dysfunctional” (11).
Tucker explains the importance of the caregivers of society that facilitate positive relations that benefit the neglected and malnourished of society. Tucker suggests that some of the attributes of codependence including depending on relationships with unavailable people, obsession with the needs of others, and not being able to say no (12).
Tucker takes time develop the characteristics of addicted personalities on unfulfillable relationships and the factors of enabling these situations. She distinguishes between submissive and dominant enablement. The aggressive traits include inability to function without the dependent relationship and demanding his or her needs be met. The more submissive person has the loving motivation that influences their own behaviors. The goal of the text is then designed to remove the shame and effects of the experiences by forgiving the discrepancies and accepting God’s promises to fulfill the gaps in our lives. Reflection questions are given to end the opening chapter.
Through defining family, emotional strongholds, and love systems, tucker gives plenty of suggestions on how to incorporate the guiding love of God to redefine our relationships with one another to a more complete setting. Tucker helps redirect out desire to people please into a more healthy kindness without the pathways towards burning out (79).
Tucker suggests that the battle for control over our lives leads towards a self-dependency that is physically and psychologically draining over time. This turn towards the self can become so detrimental that we become unable to function in interpersonal relationships (95). Escaping the cycle of control and unhealthy operating systems prevent the functions of healthy love from getting through (103). The resulting feelings of inadequacy ad guilt can be frustrations and further prevent individuals from building valuable relationships. By correcting our views through the realization that God is control ceases the reliance on the self and offers a surrender that affords peace and comfort focusing on the need for change (110).
Receiving the calming presence of forgiveness and the protection of God is restful on the mind and relieving of the tremendous amounts of stress we sometimes lay on ourselves and our codependency. Tucker does a great job of relating examples from our everyday lives to draw out just how difficult some of things we do to ourselves are. By showing us a better way and the guiding of light we can take a step God and re-focus our energy to better and fuller healthy relationships. We can correct all of the unhealthy characteristics by searching for fulfillment in finite resources. By helping other and gaining guidance from our loved ones we can enter in more perfect relationships finding God’s grace all around of.